fredag 31 januari 2014

Let the lit light die,
Screaming for mercy where there is none.
Like a plague spreading though my body,
You can't really escape yourself, can you?

Tears won't help you dear,
You are stuck.
With pictures of death dancing on your grave.
Why can't you accept his laughter?
Because he have missed you for quite the time.

You don't wanna die?
I am sorry darling,
But you don't have a choice,
We are all mad here.
And you are no different.

torsdag 30 januari 2014

Lose sight of life itself,
Spin around and start to run.
Gone missing,
Found two days later.
Led astray,
By snow fallin.

I really feel old my friend,
Like I have been here forever.
Stuck in a loop,
Without a reason to find the way out.
Just keep on breathing.

I am a lost cause darling.
All I see,
Is a crimson sea.
Beyond reckoning.

I know it well,
I am aware of who I am.
Or what I am suppose to be.
Sooner or later,
I won't be able to recover.

söndag 26 januari 2014

lördag 25 januari 2014

The world seems a bit empty,
A missing piece of the atmosphere.
And with this feeling comes a sort of greedy wish,
That you stood right next to me again..

I would say I am a bit melancholy.
Becuase I know you have it better now,
It's just that I miss you quite terribly.
Happiness is all I ever wanted for you.
Yet I just wish I could hear you voice again..

You still mean alot you know?
Though our path probably never cross again.
Dreams do come true,
Even if its just where for a while.

One day you will maybe look here again,
And remember.
We did have a good run,
Didn't we?..

fredag 24 januari 2014

Once upon a time,
I knew a little girl with peculiarly red hair.
She was afraid of the world outside,
"Nothing good will come from such a scary place"
She told me that she was wounded,
And felt that where ever she turned,
There will be a hating gazes against her.

"I to am quite the loss to the world" I told her.
"but I will help you find a path,
A way to get through the never ending days." 
And I promise you, 
Over the years with her,
She taught me more that I ever did to her.

Once I would told you that there is nothing to live for.
But now I know of colours of the sunset,
Music in the night,
Feelings of love and caring.
I may have helped you to care and see the world,
For how beautiful it can be.

But you sculpted me,
Into a fine loving person.
I wouldn't be here today,
If its not for you..

I promise to paint your life in all the colours of the world,
Just as you saved me.

torsdag 23 januari 2014

Missunderstandings and defense mechanism.
Sharp tounges and two broken hearts.
We bare mask to hide from the world.
Yet we forget,
We can see through eachothers.

When did out love for another turn to hate?
When did I start to avoid your words?
When did you start to keep it away from me?
I hurts like hell,
To even see you like this.

I'm so sorry..
I want to set it all right,
As soon as I see a picture of you,
hearing your voice,
Remembering your hand against mine.
Can't we just forget this and go back?

When you asked me
"How about a us then?"
My heart stops for a bit.
"A us would be beautiful"

onsdag 22 januari 2014

Old familiar feelings,
The same kind of warmth.
The tounge stumbles over words,
And it seems the mind can't make a clear decision.
All over some cheesey tunes.
A sting I know all to well.

There is something about your eyes,
Enchanting in a way.
Or maybe it's the your fingers cross my cheek,
It seems like I can feel the heat through the cold winter night.
It is amazing what words can do,
As long as it come from your lips.

A nice change from all the cloudy regrets inside my chest.
To actually be able to breath again.
Fading hate,
And growing love.
Still not sure what to make of it,
But hey,
I will figure it out.

tisdag 21 januari 2014

Natural wonder beyond measuring.
Liquid sky falling from above,
When the world feel enough empathy for you,
Enough to cry in your stead.

It is a calm presence.
A moment of peace in a stressful environment.
It gives me clarity,
A sense of redemtion.
But most of all,
The soothing of my mind.

I wish to wash away pieces of me,
Just trying to forget.
Why it all even mattered once.
Truth be told,
I think it is for the better anyway.

måndag 20 januari 2014

No one will come to help,
You are all alone in the big scary world.
Cut all the tiers of social contact,
Remember that they left you,
You have nothing to tell them.

Hating is so much easier than loving.
Let this  hollow feeling grow,
It's not like you care right?
Everything you do is scripted.
Just to get my help?
fuck off.

The reflection in the mirror,
I have always seen a demon within.
It's insane that it took me this long to understand.
The people around me are the real monsters.
you who ignore me.

I am so broken I can be.
But this time I have the burning flame of hatred,
Lit inside of me.

söndag 19 januari 2014

No one hears me anymore.
Nor do they see me.
It seems like I am left all alone,
Sure, I am used to it.
But time to time,
I wish I still had someone..

Like staring in to a wall,
Hoping it will answer my ridiculous questions.
I am panicking,
Breathing gets hard.
I setting of a statement of paralysed.
I wonder how I am not dead yet.

I miss your voices,
Your words on the screen,
On a piece of paper.
Yelling my lungs out,
But you don't seem to hear me anymore.

You have no idea how much it hurts,
Being alone again..

A night of silence and bright street lights gets me on the edge.
Freezing down to nothing,rattling bones.
Not a single spark of life as long as the eye can see.
A mind so blank, the only thought that comes up.
"You really fucked up this time"

The heart still follows the beat of the song.
Ears are ringing and the lips crack.
So intoxicated, the feet seems to go their own way.
Everything is so blurry,
I can't remember a thing,
Only that there are more bruises and wounds than before.

It seems like I have used my last lifeline,
No where to run this time.
A world against my loneliness,
Breaking and shattering.
The last promise,
Seems impossible to keep..

Walking a city so empty,
Bloody and bruised.
I won't make it home tonight,
As I write these words,
To a world that don't listen.

lördag 18 januari 2014

Head trauma,
Static errors,
Lighting glows,
Crackling lightning.
and unrequited love.

Slide through my shows,
Maybe you will find anything fitting.
At Least enough to entertain you.
More the previous owners,
Of me.

I want to shut down this mess,
Leave this schedule,
Unplug the machine.

But I guess you can't really judge me anymore,
When we are the same,
You my dear friend,
My lover.

Close the door behind us,
In to an empty room,
With just a monitor,
Flickering in the corner.

fredag 17 januari 2014

Who am I to deny memories and promises.
The kind heart tells the real stories.
And the wise mind let go of reason.
But now at the end,
It was worth the time.

tisdag 14 januari 2014

Stand up while listening to the tones,
She heard so many times before.
Fingertips against the skin,
In hope for contiguity.

Her head raised to the sky,
She despratly tries to hold the warmth.
Cold and shivering,
She closes her eyes.

In this darkness,
Sight doesn't matter.
With a uneven pulse,
She stands in silence.

That her world will end,
Before it even begun.

måndag 13 januari 2014

Feel the frustration,
Scream out your anger at me.
Take the agonizing pain,
And throw it all over me.
This will be the last time.

I am so sick and tired of you,
With your tricks and schemes.
Will you never learn?
I already know you,
All to well.

Why do you lie to me?
Why do you push me away?
Only to scream for help soon enough.
Why do you let me down?

But I am through,
I am done.
Turn you back against the world,
I won't show you anymore.

söndag 12 januari 2014

I am the sword you wield,
Cutting down the foes standing in your way.
I am the armor protecting your body,
Never would I break in your will.
I am the iron you use proudly,
Melting me down,
shaping me as you please.

I am the book you read,
Knowledge is our power.
I am the food on your table,
I will keep you alive.
I am the flame keeping you warm,
The flame you soon can't control.

I am the darkness,
Who nourish your nightmares.
I am your regret,
The prison you build so long ago.
I am vengeance,
The last thing you will ever see.

lördag 11 januari 2014

I don't really see the reason.
To be someone,
To be alive.
Would the world really be that different,
Without me?

I keep on losing track of time,
Waking up in the middle of the night.
Sleeping through the day.
No one seems to notice though.

I often think about pepole,
How would they react,
If I was gone tomorrow?
Why I don't use the word friends?
Oh, I don't have any left.

I can't escape my own thoughts,
It plays with me as I play with it.
Draging me down to such low state,
I can't bear it.

I think I want to be alone,
No need to care for others anymore.
By the way,
I am using the smile you gave me still.

Close your eyes,
Imagine a place for just you.
With no sickness nor pain.

Do you feel your heart blossom?
Or see the endless world,
You created within the mind?
Be your own king or queen.

There is no need to be scared,
Just breath,
Feel the blood flow.

We live

fredag 10 januari 2014

Jag förblir en forna mänsklig varelse.
Något som har en skepnad,
Men inte ett sinne.
Något av ett fiasko,
Eller ej utvecklad,
Om man nu tror på finare ord.

Ju längre i färden jag kommer,
Mindre säker blir jag på min destination.
Desto mer ljus som skiner på mig,
Ju mörkare känns jag inuti.
En ond cirkel,
Av tankar och funderingar.

Natten känns oändlig när jag ser ut från glaset.
Varken tid och rum har ingen betydelse,
Där jag sitter låst i nuet,
Med önskningar om det förflutna.

Jag har nog allt förlorat delar av mitt pussel,
Frågan är bara,
När finner jag dem igen?

torsdag 9 januari 2014

They have all taken away,
Bits and pieces of me.
By lying, cheating, hitting.
But the world never gets enough.
It won't stop,
Until I drop.

They rip me open,
Flesh, blood and bones.
Crimson with a taste of sticks and stones.
Will they ever regret?
Not as long as my existence is left.

Friends and family,
Lovers and acquaintance.
Everyone I know.
Why are you feeding of a corpse,
Who disappeared years ago?

It's all over,
There will never be,
"A new me"

onsdag 8 januari 2014

With everything changed,
A new start came with it.
For once, 
I could see everything clear.

I feel so stupid,
smiling all by my self.
And this warm feeling inside my chest,
Isn't helping at all.

I wonder why is it so hard to describe my feelings,
Atleast when it comes to gratitude.
These silly thoughts won't end.
God, its going to be a long night.

All that I wanna say is,
Thank you! 
Without this,
I wouldn't be able to shine,
Shine as any star,
On a endless night sky.

tisdag 7 januari 2014

No one seems to believe me,
But everyone gets tired of me at some point.
Then eventually they´ll leave.
They all do.

Don't get me wrong,
I can stand lonliness.
It's just the emptiness that comes with it.
My mind starts to think differently.
And it can really be scary sometimes.

How do you tell a person,
That you want to give up?
Or how do you explain scars and wounds,
That wasn't there a week ago?
I wish I had words.

For some reason, 
I chose this myself.
I can't blame others for my mistakes,
But I am glad that you can see it.
It's a little comfort,
In a empty world.

söndag 5 januari 2014

Everything went so well,
Finally got accepted,
Wounds healed again.
Yet you just had to do it.
You just had to destory the small ray of light.
Why must you crush what isn't yours?

I tried to help,
I tried to be there for you.
But it seems like nothing is good enough for you.
I am so sick of being your object,
Why can't you just see?
I won't continue be there for you,
If you just throw me away..

Oh please just try to see from my point of view.
I want to go back to what we used to be.
Just leave all this behind us,
Because right now.
We won't survive another night.. 

lördag 4 januari 2014

I often feel useless,
And don't think I do that much to stand out.
I'm not really brain or brawl,
I guess I just have a big heart.

Because when you turn to me for protection.
I feel like I am of some use,
That you actually believe in me.
I have a reason,
Someone to care about.

Even if you are the one saying thanks,
I feel its me who are the happy one.
You are my reason,
I can stand tall again.
Thanks to you.

torsdag 2 januari 2014

Feel the touch of grass against your fingertips.
The fresh smell of the sea,
And the warmth of the sun high above.
If you open up your eyes,
The sky opens up over you.
A pair of clouds floats by.
Everything is so quiet,
You only hear us breathing.

Your head in my lap,
Sleeping so peacefully.
Gently pulling my fingers through your hair.
It feels like the world stopped spinning.
Time itself slowed down.

Thinking of you,
I started to hum on the song.
The song you called our.
Only after a while,
To feel your hand against my cheek,
As my eyes look down,
Is greeted by your beautiful smile.

Lips against each other,
The weak scent of peach. 
To see your crytal clear blue eyes.
To feel your heartbeats.
All these things,
Make me understand,
Why I love you.

As the sun is slowly going down,
And as I get up and take your hand.
I take a mental picture.
To keep for days as these.
And I remeber.
I love you.